Unfortunately, I attend Camp Half Blood. Apparently, Ares is my father. I kind of hate everyone, so...it may take a while for me to get used to you.
{ooc: lmao dont be an idiot this isnt real although gerard way is super cute but yeah no this is an rp account}
{ CAMP HALF-BLOOD }
Elijah still sat cross legged, and watched her lay down. “I guess it does…if you’re an idiot,” he said, cracking a devilish smile. The only time he felt happy was when he was all alone, and reading books. He didn’t believe in complete happiness, like complete and utter bliss. You could be happy, but you couldn’t be…in ecstasy. Unless you were having sex.
“What if your like, having orgasms every five seconds? Will someone be completely happy then?” She lifted her head and raised her eye brows in question. She tried to imagine having to live like that. You would be talking to your parents and having an orgasm at the same time. It sounded pretty funny…but it did suck at the same time. Especially for guys. Having a boner all the time and all that jazz didn’t sound pleasant.
“Probably,” he said, laughing. “It might be a little painful though, if you’re one of those people who like…breathes a lot or something,” he said, rubbing his neck.
“Well, your mind sure sounds fucked up.” She smiled. “Bullies are stupid. They just are. Over half of the time the reason they bully people makes no sense. I pisses me off really. Like, you never know who the person is or what goes on behind the scenes, you know? What if you bully some kid and he already had a load of bullshit to deal with at home? What if you break the last string that held him together?”
He whole heartedly agreed. “Yeah…I mean, I was always kind of quiet, and looking like this didn’t help. People thought I was a girl, you know? They pushed me against walls, threw me in pools…It was kind of rough. And I started…cutting, when I was like, 13.”
Gage shrugged. “You don’t look like a chick to me. You look like a muy macho Ares kid.” She sighed. “People are fucked up in so many different ways. But I guess that just shows that you’re alive.” She checked her watch. “I should sleep, but I probably won’t tonight. Ugh.” She laid on the floor, getting goosebumps from how the coldness touched her back. “Does total, complete happiness even exits?” Her mind was kind of all over the place, not letting her get her thoughts together.
Elijah still sat cross legged, and watched her lay down. “I guess it does…if you’re an idiot,” he said, cracking a devilish smile. The only time he felt happy was when he was all alone, and reading books. He didn’t believe in complete happiness, like complete and utter bliss. You could be happy, but you couldn’t be…in ecstasy. Unless you were having sex.
“Bullying, abuse. I felt like I had been beaten to numbness…and I wanted to know if I could feel it,” he said, playing with the loose fibers on the blanket. “I thought it’d be better than throwing myself in front of a bus.” He laughed, giving a small smile.
“Well, your mind sure sounds fucked up.” She smiled. “Bullies are stupid. They just are. Over half of the time the reason they bully people makes no sense. I pisses me off really. Like, you never know who the person is or what does on behind the scenes, you know? What if you bully some kid and he already had a load of bullshit to deal with at home? What if you break the last string that held him together?”
He whole heartedly agreed. “Yeah…I mean, I was always kind of quiet, and looking like this didn’t help. People thought I was a girl, you know? They pushed me against walls, threw me in pools…It was kind of rough. And I started…cutting, when I was like, 13.”
Elijah laughed, still feeling a little uncomfortable. “I…I’m trying to stop,” he said, scratching his head. It seemed like he was trying to stop doing a lot of things. This wasn’t like him, he was usually so carefree. But things had changed. “I really shouldn’t, but I want to,” he continued, looking at the glass bottle. He couldn’t even tell if he was talking about cutting or drinking anymore. His stomach was done in knots, and he just wanted to sleep.
“It’s cool if you don’t want to drink. I totally get it.” She took another swig and put the vodka away. “So, what lead to it?” Him just feeling nothing felt like it was only half of it. She was curious and eventually he’d tell her. But she hoped he would forget about her stupid fear of the dark. That was something she had never talked to anyone about. It was her secret and she was entitled to it.
“Bullying, abuse. I felt like I had been beaten to numbness…and I wanted to know if I could feel it,” he said, playing with the loose fibers on the blanket. “I thought it’d be better than throwing myself in front of a bus.” He laughed, giving a small smile.
Elijah gave a small smile when she punched him. She quickly changed the subject, and he just went along with it. “Oh…uh, six days ago, I guess,” he said, pulling his sleeve back down. If she thought that one session of talking was going to fix him, she was wrong.
“That’s not long. Do you like it so far? Oh wait. That’s a stupid question, ” she scoffed, “No ever really likes this place at all.” Gage made herself another ‘taco’ and reached under her bed, pulling out a bottle of vodka. “You drink?” She took a swig and set it in front of him.
Elijah laughed, still feeling a little uncomfortable. “I…I’m trying to stop,” he said, scratching his head. It seemed like he was trying to stop doing a lot of things. This wasn’t like him, he was usually so carefree. But things had changed. “I really shouldn’t, but I want to,” he continued, looking at the glass bottle. He couldn’t even tell if he was talking about cutting or drinking anymore. His stomach was done in knots, and he just wanted to sleep.
She pulled the sleeve back down, trying not to look at him in the eyes. “Feel what, exactly?” Gage never really had been in a situation like this. She didn’t really know what to do or say. Aside from that, she was just bad at this type of things, sharing emotions or whatever.
“I felt so numb all the time…and I just wanted to see if I could feel something…and I never did, so I kept trying,” he said, running his fingers over the scars. They were oddly beautiful. But he didn’t want to tell her that. “I really just wanted to feel something,” he repeated, looking up at her.
She looked up at him and playfully punched him on the arm. “Feel that?” She made a clara.png face. “There are other ways, you know?” Half of her wanted to falcon punch him in the face for doing something so stupid. Her other half just wanted to hug him and tell him it’s okay. “So, when did you get here?” She changed the subject, trying to act like it was no big deal.
Elijah gave a small smile when she punched him. She quickly changed the subject, and he just went along with it. “Oh…uh, six days ago, I guess,” he said, pulling his sleeve back down. If she thought that one session of talking was going to fix him, she was wrong.
He tensed up as she pulled up his sleeve, holding his breath. His skin felt hot, and he didn’t want to talk. But she asked. And he didn’t want her to think it was for attention. “I…I just wanted to see if - if I could feel it,” he muttered, looking at her. His eyes were almost glazed with tears, but he didn’t dare cry.
She pulled the sleeve back down, trying not to look at him in the eyes. “Feel what, exactly?” Gage never really had been in a situation like this. She didn’t really know what to do or say. Aside from that, she was just bad at this type of things, sharing emotions or whatever.
“I felt so numb all the time…and I just wanted to see if I could feel something…and I never did, so I kept trying,” he said, running his fingers over the scars. They were oddly beautiful. But he didn’t want to tell her that. “I really just wanted to feel something,” he repeated, looking up at her.
Elijah knew he had to tell someone. And he did trust Gage. He began to reluctantly hold out his arm, clenching his lips together. Luckily, his sleeve only slid up a little bit, not showing too much. But the more he held out his arm, the more his sleeve inched up. He could see at least 3 scars, one still in the place between a scab and scar. “Um,” he whispered, not knowing what to say.
Gage’s expression dropped when she saw the few scars. She gently pulled up the rest of his sleeve. “Why?” she asked. No one just cut themselves for the fuck of it. Maybe he could talk to her. Some people just need to talk. Just let it all out. And she wasn’t just going to let it go, she didn’t care if you liked it for not.
He tensed up as she pulled up his sleeve, holding his breath. His skin felt hot, and he didn’t want to talk. But she asked. And he didn’t want her to think it was for attention. “I…I just wanted to see if - if I could feel it,” he muttered, looking at her. His eyes were almost glazed with tears, but he didn’t dare cry.
Elijah sat down on the blanket, and noticed her looking at him. Shit… he thought, wondering if she could tell. He decided not to worry about it. “I dunno…I was thinking one after the other,” he said, responding to her question.
He couldn’t help but laugh a little at the ice cream turkey taco. “That’s fucking rank,” he said, pointing at the abomination. Where are you from? The question he always hated to answer. “Uh…New Jersey,” he smiled, folding his hands in his lap.
“You know what? It’s actually good so shut up.” She smiled, taking another bite. If it wasn’t for him, Gage would probably be dying from starvation. Anyone who brought her food was an amazing person in her book. Especially someone she had just met.
“New Jersey? Like with all the stereotypical Guidos and shit?, ” she stuck her tongue out in exaggerated disgust. “That must’ve sucked.” He kept fidgeting around with his hands and sleeves. She raised an eye brow and swallowed her food. “You nervous or something?
“It did suck…” he said, tucking a piece of hair behind his ear. He looked up at the ceiling, still trying to hide his wrists. “I got beat up so much, that’s why I’m alright at hand to hand,” he continued, looking at her.
Then she asked it. The second worst question. She wanted to know why he was playing with his sleeves. “I…uh,” he said, tucking his wrists under his thighs. “It - it’s nothing, I’m fine,” he stuttered, looking down at the floor. He prayed she wouldn’t pull on his wrist, and see the scars.
